{"id":397458,"date":"2023-06-16T00:06:56","date_gmt":"2023-06-15T22:06:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/celebranti.com\/?p=397458"},"modified":"2023-11-13T11:09:33","modified_gmt":"2023-11-13T10:09:33","slug":"il-funerale-che-vorrei-programmare-il-proprio-funerale","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/celebranti.com\/en\/il-funerale-che-vorrei-programmare-il-proprio-funerale\/","title":{"rendered":"Pre-planning your own funeral"},"content":{"rendered":"<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"397458\" class=\"elementor elementor-397458\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-70fedac6 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"70fedac6\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-7e99dcdf\" data-id=\"7e99dcdf\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-68b17299 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"68b17299\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-no-translation=\"\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<style>.elementor-element-68b17299{display:none !important}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-5ef1379 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"5ef1379\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-f4ade9c\" data-id=\"f4ade9c\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7b08a7a elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"7b08a7a\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>Leaving arrangements for one&#8217;s own <strong>funeral<\/strong> means <strong>accepting with serenity<\/strong> that death is everyone\u2019s final destination. In an act of love and generosity we can take care of everything when we are still able to decide every detail.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-f2e9793 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"f2e9793\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-b8e0f41\" data-id=\"b8e0f41\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0ae90a8 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"0ae90a8\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-no-translation=\"\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Pre-planning your own funeral<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-de5b957 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"de5b957\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-ef679b4\" data-id=\"ef679b4\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-f4a8938 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"f4a8938\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-no-translation=\"\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>It is almost the end of June when I am contacted by a young man who tells me that his dad is terminally ill and that he is looking for a celebrant to conduct a <strong>non-religious funeral to celebrate his life<\/strong>.<\/p><p>The son tells me that his father is in palliative care at home, that he is perfectly lucid and aware of his situation, and, most importantly, that he has delegated his son to take charge of <strong>organizing a secular ceremony for his final farewell<\/strong>.<\/p><p>I have always been open-minded and I realize that the <strong>desire to pre-plan one\u2019s own funeral<\/strong> should be completely normal but, talking to family and friends, I discovered that some people were surprised and even shocked at the idea.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-01815db elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"01815db\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-968fbf7\" data-id=\"968fbf7\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3275914 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"3275914\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-no-translation=\"\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">The family visit<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-17943a7 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"17943a7\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-28918a4\" data-id=\"28918a4\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1da8f84 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"1da8f84\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>Driving to the family visit, I wonder: &#8220;Will he be there? How should I behave? What if I say something inappropriate?&#8221;<\/p><p>I decide that the best thing is to imagine myself in his place. We already have one thing in common, which is <strong>the desire to plan our own funeral<\/strong>. So I ask myself: &#8220;How would I want people to behave toward me if I were in his place?&#8221;<\/p><p>When I get there, I am sorry to find that he is in hospital having some tests, as I really wanted to meet him in person. I talk to the family about <strong>how to structure the ceremony<\/strong> and then we have a long conversation about the man\u2019s incredibly full life and rich personality as I take notes for the eulogy.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-31bb1cf elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"31bb1cf\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-3f5246b\" data-id=\"3f5246b\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5a19b2a elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"5a19b2a\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-no-translation=\"\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">A funeral followed by an aperitivo<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-593fca8 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"593fca8\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-96a2504\" data-id=\"96a2504\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-a62efad elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"a62efad\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>The family has no idea how long we have \u2014 they give me a range of two weeks to two months \u2014 but as we prepare the ceremony, the son conveys to me his <strong>father\u2019s precise wishes:<\/strong> <strong>his choices for music, who might speak, which readings he would like to include.<\/strong> He also chooses <strong>where he wants the ceremony to be held<\/strong> (a small deconsecrated church in the middle of the woods at the top of a hill, a place he loved when he was young). Finally, he asks his son to <strong>contact a caterer:<\/strong> after the ceremony, he would like his friends and family to <strong>toast his memory with an aperitivo<\/strong>.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-cf6cb88 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"cf6cb88\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-346c59a\" data-id=\"346c59a\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-fabb2a0 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"fabb2a0\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-no-translation=\"\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Leaving your last dispositions is an act of love<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-cd31226 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"cd31226\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-no-translation=\"\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-c050c41\" data-id=\"c050c41\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-660c30d elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"660c30d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>The day after he dies, we hold the funeral. Everything <strong>is exactly what he and his family wanted.<\/strong><br \/>Knowing that death is as much a part of us as life requires great strength and certitude. Leaving <strong>arrangements for one&#8217;s own funeral<\/strong> means, as Piero Angela recently said, accepting with serenity that death is everyone\u2019s final destination. We can leave the decisions to family members when we are gone, or \u2014in an act of love and generosity \u2014 we can <strong>take care of everything when we are still able to decide every detail.<\/strong><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Leaving arrangements for one\u2019s own funeral means accepting with serenity that death is everyone\u2019s final destination. In an act of love and generosity we can take care of everything when we are still able to decide every detail.<\/p>","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":397470,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9155,8420,8428],"tags":[9121,8454,8455,9123,9122,8451,9124,8456,9126,8453,9125,8452],"class_list":["post-397458","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-altre-cerimonie","category-cerimonie","category-funerale","tag-celebrant","tag-celebrante","tag-commiato","tag-funeral","tag-funeral-celebrant","tag-funerale","tag-lay-funeral","tag-morente","tag-organising-ones-own-funeral","tag-organizzare-un-funerale","tag-planning-a-funeral","tag-programmare-il-proprio-funerale"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Il funerale che vorrei: programmare il proprio funerale - 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